On th 5th day of Christmas

Imma update this dusty space w colourful peektures!

First it's my narcisstic gf's 21st birthday celebration @ party world & NaNa restaurant for awesome LONGAN WATER;D

Awesome time spent w girlies @ Party World watching Chinyee & Mary going crazy & entertaining us rest. Laughed till my tummy hurts & tears welling up, they were that funny!

& we met Sam & th boys for dinner @ Far East! Split ways w Baby while he shopped w his friends while th girlies WENT SHOPPING:D

Note to self: Don't shop w Chinyee cus we're both impulse buyers! Didnt regret my kawaii blouse though! WORTH EVERY CENT! Hahahahha!

& it's Christmas countdown! Had a hearty & warm cozy dinner @ Rocky Pizza. Delicious, I tell you! & th serving is crazy huge! Gobbled 2 slices myself, along w th over cheesy lasgne. Prefer th pizza over it anytime! & we had gifts exchange...which i got a rolling eye cow from Nelson. LOL.

Th only similarity we're got - rlly good @ rolling eyes. HAHAHAHAH! Th cow looked uber scary though, especially whn it's eyes bulges out everytime you squeeze it. Now is't kept nicely inside my cabinet (cuz it scared mummie tt day while she was cleaning up my room & i left it on th table!) LOLOLOL!

Monopoly deal @ Boo's place aftr dinner & our countdown was spent... lazing around? Had log cake! Courtesy from Chinyee ('s company. LOL) & laoda nua-ed away & slept. So we ended up going back @ 2ish. Must have a car next year & I'll fetch everyone out for fun! No more cooping @ home gurls! I will get my license (AND A CAR) before next Christmas:D

Miss these gurls alr..

Can't wait t see them again for NY countdown!

Anwy, Im craving for steamboat.

Can we go for steamboat soon? ;D

Love all angels in my life, especially Khooonglai. :)

thank god.

For a moment I thought everything was going t end. That you were going t walk out on me, on us just like that.
For a moment I wanted for tt t happen, until I realize I love you too much t let you go.

Th moment I said "thn so be it" I regretted how th words tasted on my tongue. Maybe I was wrong, but I thought you were holding back tears through th fight. Maybe I was wrong, but I thought I wasnt th only weak one.

Forgive me whn I said it felt as though you don't care about me.

I'm sorry.. I love you.

Holiday

Holiday smells like nail polish, movie theatre, shopping mall... & most importantly MY BED
WOOHOO!

I'd srsly NOT consider twice if he asks me t marry him.
I don't care if he's 17 years older.
Which Princeton graduate of 15 racial groups would look so hot, have th brain t break out from prison, can take up being a gay hairstylist or be a bad boy cheer leader wannabe!
Only him,
Wentworth:)

HELLO!

Bloggin on my new netbook now!!!
Just a couple hours ago I was crying over it. Okay, Imma baby. Cuz I can't dl & install some progs. Zzz


Anw now Im happily using it; Acer Happy in purple!
Lovin now! Now I dont hafta bring big bags & lug th freakking big Compac t school. Dear Compa, I love you still. But for now you'd stay home. NIAHAHAHAHA!


Anw, CT's coming & Im rlly stressed outb for IEF. OMG. Hwating & Imma conquer all papers!
Gambatte! Hwaiting! Jiayou! Go go go!

Stressed

It's always Thursday that makes me feel goddamnit awful & like crap.
Cuz there's IS & it's forever rushing for time.
Take tday for example, we go through th concepts tday & r supposed t come up w advertisements & present it the next week. Hello! You think we only have this ONE module!?
It's crazy rush lor! & obviously I can't work well under stressed please.


So every time aftr class on Thursday I'd call Baby & rant. Srsly feel like crap now. Im like forever rushing for time, fighting for tt extra one minute t get things done. & I HATE IT.


& now I have another project on hand which I have no idea how & where t start. So demoralizing. Especially whn th deadline's like NEAR. Ya la, I procrastinate too. But m just not motivated t do anything. I know Im trusted w that responsibility & I should fulfil it. But somehow, I feel like I'm not profficient in that at all.


Nd it's moments like this, that makes me feel utterly useless. People around me, they can be good with so many things. Techy stuff, fashion, photography, artistic creations, blablabla. But I can't seem t find one that is applicable t myself.
Like I have no passion. I have no goals in life. More recently, especially seeing few mates graduating & moving t th next stage in life - working. I question myself more often than I thought I would; what d I want t do next? What d I want t do w myself aftr I graduate? Where d I see myself at in 5 years' time?
I simply have no answer.
& that is dejecting.


Maybe I think too much, I don't know? It's so stressful & saddening how a simple stressed up day can make me so negative altogether. It's a every week thing, t feel like Im rushing t finish my IS reports, I should take it lightly cuz I saw it coming & I know I'd ultimately complete it on time. But nonetheless, I always, ALWAYS, let it get t me & successfully make myself feel rotten. & thanks uh, th rain tday did not help.


Realistically, I have my week4 tutorials t complete. I have my IEF elearning t complete. I have my BCOMM report t write up. & I have so many projects that I have not started a fucking single shit. I ought t be worrying & rushing. But I just don't give a fucking damn now. I just wnna cut away everything relating t school...
Right now.. I just wnna go back t Wentworth Miller (& my awesome dream this morning).


Bye guys.

Why is it always th IS modules of a pass or fail grade that eats up my time.
But lucky for me, apart from CATS, all other IS team mates r awesome people!
Ok back t my Social Psychology report NOW.

The Pact

There was nothing left to say.       He covered her body with his, and as she put her arms around him she could picture him in all his incarnations: age five, and still blond; age eleven, sprouting; age thirteen, with the hands of a man. The moon rolled, sloe–eyed in the night sky; and she breathed in the scent of his skin."I love you,"she said.       He kissed her so gently she wondered if she had imagined it. She pulled back slightly, to look into his eyes.       And then there was a shot.

Can you imagine you love someone so deeply & so much that you can't picture yourself without them?

That whn you close your eyes t see yourself, you never do that without picturing that person right next t you?

Can you imagine you love somebody so much that you're willing to do anything they ask of you? 

Even if it meant murder.

Chris & Em were joined at th hips & from their earliest memory, they always had each other. 

They were each other's other half.

But Em is keeping a secret from everyone. Her family, her friends & even her other half.

So much so that she couldn't stand living & wanted Chris t help her end her life.

Like any other JP's novel, when I was reading The Pact, I was enthralled by th story & couldn't put th book down.

Th fear nd loneliness Chris felt during th 7 months when he was jailed, th way you struggle t go t th funeral of your beloved but you just can't cuz you're suspected of being th murderer, th way you hurt whn you read about Em's sufferings,

th determination Gus had & all she wanted t was t save her son but her husband was not supportive, & th struggle Chris went through before he shot Em. It's like you could feel it. 

Like you could understand & feel how they felt.

You don't really know if Chris shot Em until you finish th book. 

In between here & there, I did wonder. If th person you love deeply was suffering & was begging you t end their suffering, what would you do?

Especially if it meant having them leaving you. I don't know if I'd be strong as Chris.

He loved Em so much that he could bear th pain & sufferings himself, but he could not bear hers.

He knew that saving her would mean killing her but he still did it.

He loved her that much t put her pain before his & stayed behind t be called a murderer, even though all he did

was t relieve his loved one from pain.

Many a time throughout th book, I stopped & wonder if I could do it. I wonder if I could take it, being left behind,

w th scene haunting me & being tried w people calling me murderer even though all I ever wanted was t free my loved one from his pain & agony.

I've read 5 of JP's novel & each time I finish reading one, I'd go into a withdrawal.

Whn I read My Sister's Keeper, I was completely drawn to it. Th impact it left was huge. & I started wondering about many things.

Now that I've finished this (& am about t embark on House Rules), I feel ashamed.

I don't know if I could pull th trigger if my beloved asked me to. I don't know if I would hate him for leaving me behind (not that Chris didn't hate Em for doing that, but he got over it as soon as he had that thought cuz he loved her that much)

It may be as selfish, but I'd rather he be here & I'd suffer his pain w him rather than helping him t die & live as an empty soul.

Love is about being able to put th person before yourself & Chris did that. He overcame his fear of living w/o Em, being called a murderer & put her wish (of dying) as priority & fulfilled her wish.

I love Eric. But my love for him, is not th same as Chris had loved Em. I belong t th selfish clan.

I'm not saying what Chris did was right. In fact, I agreed w his actions. 

But I just don't think I have th courage t do it & I feel weak for my feeling&actions doesn't go together.

Married.

One of my secondary school best mate is getting hitched!!!

Of course Im happy for her, cuz she & her boyfriend have been together since sec4 I suppose.

We used t tease her & called her th MANEATER cus she practically liked every boys in our school, even th ugliest then, GH.

But she's now happily engaged to her boyfriend & while I'm bloody happy for her, I AM SO ENVIOUS OF HER TOO!

Y'know, it's always been my dream age t get married at 21. & now that I really am 21, I see myself nowhere near that "target" & it's kinda um, sad? Or rather, disheartening. I know, it's doesnt matter whether if you're married or not so long you're in love w each other. But, I just wnna marry th person I love.

Maybe it's th feeling of coming back t a place you call "our home", maybe it's th feeling of someone getting your back no matter what, or th vows you swore by for each other when you get married, or even th "marital status" column you tick whn you fill application forms. HAHAHAH. Of course th last maybe was a joke.

But y'know, th difference of saying we're together (but not married) VS we're married.

I used t think marriage @ 21 was possible & I wnna do that. Perhaps cuz my mum was alr married t my dad whn she was my age. She'd sometimes joke about that & say that by 21 she's alr married but at 21, I'm still like a kiddo who can't even take care of herself.

Don't laugh at what I'm about t say cuz I'm sure all gurls have dreamt or at least given some thought about it before; th dream proposal.

While many always talk about their dream wedding, I always envision my dream proposal. Afterall, a proposal must occur first before th wedding isn't it?

I've always dreamt my proposal (obviously boyfriend proposing t me) t be filmed down. So that I could play it during my actual wedding day. I remember I ever watched a show, helping th guys t propose t their gfriends & they'd film down their expressions & play em during their wedding.

My god, it was so beautiful & romantic! Those expressions whn th boyfriends went down on one knee & whn she say I do. IT IS PRICELESS. & c'mon, you don't get guys getting down on a knee proposing t you everyday, why wouldn't you wnna film it down & playback later!

Content might not be cohesive.

I am just envious of people who get married young.

Bye!

Life has been good lately. Nua-ing on our big bed (though tad hard cuz it's still new) all day long & spent th day we were supposed t go pak tor sleeping at home instead. Cuz th bed has been that comfortable & th weather has been very good.


Haven't been blogging cuz I've new stuff t occupy myself with; Jodi Picoult's novels!!!! So excited cuz I bought 2 whn I went book shopping w mumsie. M half way through th first & can't wait for t read th ending! It's called The Pact. Syazzy if you're reading this, borrow from me if you're interested! ^^


Ok gtg! Love ya'll whose still here. Xx

Super backdated!

This post serves t upload all pictures that has been on my laptop since my birthday, most were taken on that day. No choronological order cuz I'm just dead bored in school so imma blog but Im not bored enough t arrange th pictures all over again CUZ I DIDNT UPLOAD THEM IN ANY ORDER.

w my subete, looking very shaggged cuz we braved th rain & thunderstorm moments before th photo was taken.

random day back @ home. HAHAHA.

Previously whn we went t Boo's house, she played with my hair & voila!
Luckily it was temporary. OMG. I think (& they think) I look like a poodle -.-


Baby looking uber shagged cuz entire outfit was soaking wet.
No kiddin whn I said even our underwears were wet. Eeeek.
Wonder how I could tahan it that day. -.-


My gurls, who 费劲心思 t gather 21 purple items for me. My favourite was th diary!!
&& I havent told anyone, but now whenever I bath, I'd think of them. LOL!
Cuz th purple shower rag (whatever it's called) they gave me, OMG. I always thought it'd be pain t use that until I used it. It was awesome siol! Now I use it everyday. HAHAHAHAH!


Baby looking very shagged again. LOL. He rode over almost midnight & brought me for my first 21st meal. LOL. Supper @ our usual place.
&& he gave me a white polaroid! WOOHOO!
Btw Nana & Xuan, it cost 120$ HAHAHA I mistake for nearly 200$. Zzz

My AWESOMESAUCE who always, I REPEAT, ALWAYS get th best present!
Last year they got me this medium vintage bag (which I loved t death!)
Ya know Im th kind whn a bag spoils, I'd just throw away since it's a great excuse t get a new one. But th one they gave me, Im still using it NOW despite th zip is alr gone case! See how much I love it!
& my awesome sauce got me a Guess bracelet & a Dorothy Koomson novel for me. I love th bracelet t death, further & much more than I love th bag (HAHAHAH!) but I couldn't bear t wear it out, in fear I might drop it unknowingly. I wore it th moment they gave me & it almost dropped once. Zzz
Sometimes I truly wonder how they manage t get it so right?! SOULMATE101 HEEHEE!

Dearest frowning; apparently he doesnt like my poodle hair. In fact nobody liked it lor. Other than th stylist herself. LOL!

Ohya, my awesome birthday cake Baby suggested. Super rich chocolate w crispy kernels or smthg below it. I know Fourleaves have a similiar one t how I describe this, but I tell you. You won't like that anymore aftr you eat this!! Available @ PS & Tampines 1!

Thanks t Laoda & Boo for my dream t come true, iPhone!!!! In a cookie form -____-

From my relatives!!! Matches w my bracelet! Heeheehee! LOVE GUESS & VS SO SO MUCH!

Dearest Nyan Niko Nyan ♥

While waiting for my show t load..

I thought I should update w an entry from 3weeks ago?
God Im such a procrastinator recently.

Anw I was just thinking this morning, I used t be a very blog-gy person. Like whenever something happens, I'd be like, Oh Imma blog about this! But now that Twitter is around, I twit instantly nd hence neglecting my blog. Cuz everything is so updated thr nd I feel silly blogging bout stuff that I've alr twitted about. But anw, blog is still good cuz I post more photos nd I don't hafta phrase nd rephrase just so I could make sense within 140characters. HAHAHAHA!

So, Baby nd I went t Sin Ming Autocare yesterday t pay for his installment. Which reminded me of th draft that has been sitting quietly in my dashboard for some time!
These were on 27th Sept (LONG AGO!) whn brother nd I accompanied Baby t get his first automobile in his life:D

*honto ni cho proud of my anata*

Obviously it's not this one la. LOL. But this's a classic Vespa okay! Mai siaosiao. HAHAHAH. I love it lorrrr. If I have th license (inspired t take it up again but that'd be another entry on it's own) nd buy one! I can alr imagine it in lilac/lavender colour w a vintage woven basket @ th back lor!!!

Anw this belongs t th owner of th shop, according t brother. He's a uncle la, but omg why his bike cho kawaii!!

We (brother fetch me & we met w Baby thr) arrived early @ 10 ish nd Baby was late. Sat thr t wait for him nd th mechanic t come t work. Browsing through those bike magazines they have nd brother shares w me th different type of bikes nd th ones he adores. *eye opener*

Brother fooling ard on th Boss' bike!

th pet next door, called Ah Nua cuz he literally nua-ed thr th whole day! Still waiting...
& we waited from 1030 all th way t like, what? 6:30??

Bro decided t saw his handlebar!!!

th original ones that he had.
I think this's nicer than th ones he changed t lorrrr.

Baby's bike in th making.

Servicing before we vroom it off!

Candid shot, sawing his handlebar still. HAHAHA.

Then Baby decided t help...

I helped too!

While one of em saw, another nd I would help t hold th bike cuz it's v shaky!

Baby's bike in front nd bro's orange baby behind:D

So finally everything's done! & we went home in th rain

cuz we've stayed there for wayyyy too long nd I was complaining.

Th next day...

Baby took no time t get used t th bike nd he's alr good t go by th next day!
&& he could ride w me behind YAY!


So since that day, we've been riding around alot!
I havent taken any public transport since,
except whn I went out on my own (ONCE!)
nd whn I went down t his place yesterday.


Speaking of which,
I HATE TH DIMSUM DOLLIES JINGLE ON TH TRAIN!!!
It's so dumb can!

Random photos of Baby

I can haz Chicky Meal (LOL)!

My birthday post coming up next! :)

Random

Me, wearing almost all of th 21 purple prez my gurls bought for my birthday:)
Oh, th note on my nose says BIMBO-.-

&& my Babyboy in his windbreaker looking cho cool:D

'cept th expression; candid shot!

my Guanaja Rive Guache awesome chocolatey birthday cake!

On a random night, while Baby rode us out t have an ice cream treat:)

Will be back w another peektures filled post soon!

Xx